Taboo
by DracinaStormsailor
Summary: Two mates on both sides of war forced to keep their lives a secret from those around them as they suffer the effects of their sacrifice for each other.  Story's future is at the mercy of the readers for now.


This is a little piece I had sitting around collecting dust. I figured I should let it out to roam and get some fresh air. It's just a little look into the beginning of Bumblebee and Barricade's relationship from the universe me and VT have been creating and are still keeping to ourselves...

I really don't know what direction this will take. It's possible it will remain a one-shot and who knows, maybe it'll take off into another story. Which I really don't have the time for. ~sigh~ But bunnies will be bunnies.

Anyways, I will delay no longer!

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><p>"I'm sorry" he whispered, or tried to but his slagged vocalize didn't make a sound. Giving a silent sigh, he rubbed at his face tiredly. How he wished he could say it right now, apologize to the one he was about to bring pain to. He loved his mate dearly and he couldn't begin to fathom what he was about to put their bond through. They were no strangers to pain, or agony. Just their bond was a horrendous thought to either side of this war and they were force to keep their choice a secret, but they didn't give a slag about faction. All they cared about was each other, and for now, it was enough.<p>

To some point, Bumblebee really had to say he enjoyed the secrecy. It kept the spy on alert and it was kind of fun to creep up on his mate unexpectedly even though he usually got caught the majority of the time by him and became a "captive" for a very pleasurable undisclosed duration. So yes, there were some definite perks to what they were doing, but sometimes, it wasn't worth it. The waiting was too long, always too long and before they came together his spark would be screaming for its other half and it took all the training and will power the little spy had just to keep from running off prematurely.

But now, now his spark was howling in pain as it thrashed within his chest from the newest orders he had been given. He was being sent out, far out...alone. There would be no more secret meetings, just only the black and cold loneliness of space surrounding him. A soft static whine managed to rip free past his damaged vocalize catching the attention of his guardian who wasn't far away but the yellow mech hardly noticed past the stabbing pain in his spark at the thought of never seeing his mate again.

"Bee?" Ironhide asked in concern dropping a hand on his shoulder and rousing the youngling from his thoughts, "are you alright?"

A hard shudder ran through the smaller frame before Bumblebee could get a firm hold on his pain again. He couldn't answer, the truth was that he didn't know if he was alright. He didn't feel alright, he didn't know if he ever would again. However, after a few more moments he looked up at the black mech with a weak grin.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he lied, switching to his comm line. No one knew of his bonding with Barricade and he was sure to keep it that way. At this point if the news got out he didn't know what would happen, but he did know one thing; he would not risk putting his mate in further danger and kept silent. Not that he could really speak at the moment seeing as Megatron had completely slagged his vocalizer in their last encounter.

Frowning, Ironhide looked down at his youngling. He wasn't a fool, he knew the little yellow mech since he had been a tiny yellow creature of joy and endless energy. He also knew Bee was lying to him, it wasn't hard to figure out but the real question was why? The spy, for the most part when it didn't involve work, never lied to him about something serious, but now, looking at the clear pain in the mech's optics, he knew this was far from some simple problem.

Slipping free from Ironhide's gentle grip, the youngling left silently and without warning. Ironhide wanted to go after him, force his charge to tell him what was causing the pain so he could go out and blow its aft to the pit, yet he remained still. Maybe it was time he gave his youngling some space to try and handle whatever was happening on his own, maybe it was time to give him some independence and to wait until, or if, he was needed.

Grumbling, he was still unsure if he really wanted to wait for the moment to come but he knew he needed to.

"Ironhide? Why are you just standing here?" Ratchet asked, coming up on the large weapon specialist.

"Is he still hurting?"

"Who?" he asked giving Ironhide a questioning look.

"Bee," he grunted.

"No. I was sure to disconnect the relays for his vocalizer so that would hurt him no further. Why? Did he say it was?"

He couldn't answer as his processor whirled. The younger mech was suffering, it was so obvious but if it wasn't from the latest fight then what could possibly be causing his charge so much agony? It wasn't like he had a mate to worry about.

Ironhide froze. Was it possible? All the signs, disappearances, changes in attitude he had before and after vanishing…No. He was young, far too young but then again…so were he and Ratchet when they first bonded. But, just WHO would the little spy bond with? No one on this ship would, not with himself as the yellow mech's overprotective guardian, and if it WAS an Autobot, even from another unit, it would've been announced by now; soldiers could never hide a secret. Besides it wasn't like Bumblebee really had the opportunity to be around any others long enough to establish a relationship with a hiding neutral. Obviously he was over thinking this. It was something else, had to be.

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><p>I know this is shorter than what I usually write but what do ya'll think? Like Broken Sparks, I will leave this in all your capable hands out there to decide if it should be more than a one shot. Though I will not lie, if this one does continue, there is a high chance that it will become VERY sticky.<p>

For the others that are following my other stories, I am TRYING to get the chapters out but life is just SO super crazy and I'm just battling unexpected circumstances to get anything done. Hope you will hold in there for the coming chapters because despite appearances, I WILL finish all my stories.

Reviews pleeeease, tell me what you think I should do.

-DS


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